Hello everyone! Long time, no talk! So, I just landed from the ride that life decided that I needed to go on for some reason. I gotta say, I’m glad life grabbed me by the horns and took me on a joy ride because I needed it, and I didn’t know I did. This ride was full of mental health help, cleaning out my house…and my personal life, regaining my footing and learning how to walk again on my own two feet. With the help of my husband, kiddos, family and true friends, I am not only walking, I am running and don’t plan on stopping any time soon.
I have been doing so much writing lately and although I could post my completed ones now, I don’t want to, and I’ll tell you why. In the time that I have been on that joy ride and writing, I have been learning and observing and realizing that in the mist of all things great, busy and exhausting, I have still been feeling incomplete, not myself and lost. I thought to myself, man oh man if I am feeling so incomplete while I am feeling so damn happy, this must be a trend happening to others…right?
Whenever I believe that something can be relatable, I always want to write about it and reach out because I simply don’t ever want anyone to ever feel alone. I have mentioned that in many of my past blogs. When you’re going through something incredible, you want to share it. When you are going through something scary, sad or depressing, you want comfort. To celebrate alone or to try and heal alone can feel horrible. The numbing you are feeling can go away just to feel the pain of wondering if you are the only one going through what you are going through.
So! I wanted to write about all that I have been pondering about in the past few months and it has been a lot! Many of you know that I have started a new job and with that comes worry. Am I going to do a good job? Am I going to learn this new job fast enough? Am I going to fit in with my new coworkers? Am I going to even like this new job? Did I make the right decision to leave my old job and start a new one? Those questions and so many more kept running through my mind for about…5 minutes!
I can honestly say that I have never loved a job as much as I love this job. My boss is incredible, my coworkers are a dream and being back in the medical field is EXACTLY what I want and need. I love going to work every single day. I love doing my job every day, I love being with my work family every day and I love being with all the patients every day. I feel like I have a purpose and I feel like I am making a difference. So, why am I feeling incomplete?
I have been redoing my house with my husband…well, I buy all the things and tell him what I want, and he does it. For the first time in almost 10 years of living in my dream home, it is finally coming together. This spring and summer we are painting the outside of the house, redoing landscaping, building our dream backyard, gutting the garage and building Jay his man cave all while continuing to gut and redo the inside. So, why when I come home, I feel incomplete?
I have a new nephew! I have wanted to be an aunt FOREVER and I finally am! Ben Ben is an absolute dream and I am so in love with my little squish! I see him through out the week and every weekend. My heart melts every time he sees me and gets so happy that he reaches for me then hugs me when he is finally in my arms. I get to pick him up from daycare every Friday afternoon right after I pick up my kddos from school. I am so blessed to be his Dodo (yes, my name is not Aunt Joei, it’s Dodo). So, why do I feel incomplete when I go to see him?
With everything incredible going on in my life, with more happiness being felt that I have felt in years, with more dreams coming true and more amazing memories being made, I seem to be asking myself often…why do I feel so incomplete? And the answer is simple. Life. With life comes the expectation that something better is right around the corner. Even if you have it all, you still keep taking a gander at that corner to see what better things await your attention. All that really does is make what is right in front of you not seem good enough when in reality, it is everything that you could ever need and want.
It’s so easy to look at people around you with newer and bigger homes, fancier cars, better paying jobs, marriages that seem blissfully and consistently happy, pictures of them traveling around the world and their kids with the Honor Roll certificates on their fridge. What you have to remember is every single morning that you wake up, is your chance to change the world. To look at your life and smile. You may not have what the person next to you has, but you have a roof over your head, clothes on your back and food on your table. Who cares if the roof is old, the clothes aren’t name brand and the food is hotdogs and mac n’ cheese. Remember that you are here for a reason, and it is not to compare yourself to others, instead it’s to rise above that. Look at each and everyday with a grateful heart and never forget that you have it all as well.
What we need to do is rise above that expectation. Rise above it all. Understand that you need to rise above what others have and take a deeper look at how lucky you truly are. Focus on that instead of what they have. They aren’t you! And remember, if anyone is going to compare you to them because you are doing something, buying something, decorating something or talking about something that they have done or are doing, then they need to go back to school and learn where the sun rises and sets because it doesn’t rise and set of their a$$. Rise above it!
This year, RISE ABOVE!
Rise above the hate.
Rise above the one uppers.
Rise above the know-it-alls.
Rise above the finger pointers.
Rise above the drama.
Rise above the comparing.
Rise above the past.
Rise above the fear.
Rise above the pain.
Rise above the doubters.
Rise above the judgments.
Rise above the eye rolling.
Rise above it all and remember…
Whether you’re depressed or the happiest you’ve been in a long time.
Whether you have lost it all or have everything you’ve ever wanted.
Whether you can’t stop smiling or can’t stop crying.
Whether you put yourself last just to keep the ones you love first.
Whether you feel like you can move mountains or feel like you can’t even move a feather.
Whether your bank account is overflowing or jingling with just the sound of change.
Whether you have the “perfect” body or you have dimples everywhere, but your cheeks when you smile.
Whether you have a house full of family and friends or a room filled with only your thoughts.
Always imagine the possibilities and never take what you have for granted.
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